Health, Fashion, Parenting and Women Related Issues

Understanding the (Parenting) Difference Between Men and Women

There’s a scene in My Fair Lady where an exasperated Professor Henry Higgins wonders aloud, “Why can’t a woman be more like a man?” Well, moms are sometimes guilty of indulging in a little bit of reverse sexism, insisting that dads would be much better parents if only they were more like moms!

Men are not biologically inferior when it comes to raising children; they simply have a different style. Here’s what researchers have identified as the key differences between the two sexes in their interaction with children:

Type of play. Mothers are more likely to introduce toys into play when they’re playing with their children, and fathers are more likely to engage in rough-and-tumble play. (Now there’s a newsflash for you!) The theory is that moms get enough body-to-body contact during pregnancy and breastfeeding, so they’re less inclined to engage in this particular type of play than dads.

Frustration level. Dads are more willing to allow kids to experience a greater amount of frustration than moms are when those children are attempting to master a particular task. Read more

Here are some things you will want to know if you have a positive child:

When it’s a good thing: A generally happy kid is fun to be around. Consider yourself lucky if you ended up with a kid with this type of temperament.

When it’s not such a good thing: It can be easy to overlook the needs of an “easy kid” who always seems to be in a good mood, simply because a child like this tends to be less demanding.

Bringing out the best in your child: Don’t overlook the needs of your “happy kid” just because he may not be as demanding as some of his siblings or peers. It’s not fair to punish him for being easy to get along with!

Some children are highly cautious—even fearful—in new situations. They’re the ones who can be found clinging to their mother’s legs on the first day of school or hiding behind the couch whenever someone new has been invited over for dinner.

Here are some tips on coping with a shy child:

Try to understand what’s at the root of the problem if she refuses to cooperate in a particular situation. She may be refusing to go to bed because she feels lonely or afraid when she’s in her room. She may be refusing to eat the casserole that you whipped up for dinner because it contains a vegetable she doesn’t recognize. It’s easier to deal with a particular problem once you’ve pinpointed the root cause. At that point, you can start brainstorming some creative solutions.

Even if you’re a natural-born extrovert who’s never shied away from a new situation in your life, let your child know that you understand how she’s feeling and that you’re not angry at her for being shy or scared. Although it can be incredibly frustrating to sign your child up for a gym class only to have her spend the entire session crying and begging to go home, she can’t help the way she feels, so it’s important to be kind and empathetic.

Encourage your child’s attempts at socialization. Continue to expose her to social situations even if she isn’t willing to do anything more than tentatively observe the other children from the sidelines. Eventually, she’ll become more comfortable with the idea of socializing with other children.

Accept the possibility that your child may not outgrow her shyness any time soon. Research has shown that only 40 percent of shy toddlers overcome their feelings of inhibition by the time they start kindergarten.